“I’m so lonely. You just don’t understand.”
I read this quite often online. And of course I hear it in person.
I hear ya.
I also understand now, even more, why scripture encourages singles to be concerned about the needs of the church. There are countless needs in the church that need the support of those who don’t have the obligations of a spouse or even children.
If I were not single, what I’m currently doing would potentially be drastically limited. Being single allows you the opportunity to focus on all of the gifts that God gave you and maximize your time.
Are all of your dreams fulfilled that God placed in you? Surely busyness isn’t the cure for loneliness, but meditating on lack doesn’t bring glory to God.
Don’t get me wrong, I certainly appreciate the company and physical presence of a man. Lord knows! But even since Ma’s passing, I’ve gotten to go back to my normal pace/cadence/rhythm. It’s been a joy to activate so many of the visions and dreams I’ve been building up during the last two years of caring for her.
Take one SINGLE minute and celebrate this time and ask God to breathe on it like never before and to teach you how to responsibly steward your time as a single individual.
Questions to ask:
How can I serve a married couple today?
How can I serve a single person today?
What elderly person needs help?
Is there a child I should be mentoring?
Who can I train with my skills?
Is there anyone who could benefit from my strength or wisdom today?
Does someone need help moving?
Can I help someone with their end of the year tasks?
Does someone need help with holiday shopping?
Who can I be poured into today?
Am I legalistic?
Am I judgmental?
Am I full of grace and seasoned with salt?
Do I know how to talk to people?
Am I a good listener?
Are there any widows who need company?
Have I visited cancer waiting rooms lately and passed out hats for those losing their hair?
Do I know anyone in the hospital who needs to be visited?
Is anyone hungry?
Can I host a cooking class?
Is there another single person who needs company this holiday?
How can I host events to bring more singles together?
Should I consider hosting a Bible study or movie night in my home?
Do I frequent coffee shops or universities with lots of traffic and new people?
Do I visit the same places and keep the same routines?
Have I finished writing my first book or blog?
What keeps me humble?
What makes me feel haughty?
Do I think that I’ve arrived?
Who am I helping?
Am I getting counseling regularly?
Am I physically fit?
Am I emotionally fit?
Am I spiritually fit?
Is my soul well?
Is my home clean?
Am I a hoarder?
Am I being mentored and coached?
Do I work out regularly?
Who do I meet at the gym?
How is my appetite?
Am I overweight or underweight?
Do I regularly talk to people online and in person?
Am I am extrovert? How can I use my gifts as an extrovert?
Am I an introvert? How can I use my gifts as an introvert?
Is there anyone grieving who just needs to talk?
How many languages do I know?
Am I fluent in at least three languages?
Do I have a passport?
When will I use my passport again?
Do I use all modes of transportation at least once annually?
Does a girl need help taking out her braids?
Does a guy need his hair cut?
Am I good with my hands?
Can I fix cars?
And I good with computers?
Can I do makeup?
Can I make jewelry?
What I can do with my hands that will bring me more income?
When you’ve addressed a few of these questions, you’ll find plenty of things to take your mind off of the absence of a mate. Again, these elements are not to DISTRACT you from that fact that you are single, but to ATTRACT you to fulfilling your purpose and responsibly stewarding your time.
P. S. Visit sevenby30.com/books to snag my eBook on how I planned for Antarctica called, “7 Steps to the 7th Continent.” It’s available in English and Arabic. 💋
P. S. S. God’s design for us doesn’t always include a significant other, but God’s design always includes a significant purpose. 💫